How people structure their relationships is distinct from their sexual or romantic orientation. A person of any orientation can be monogamous or non-monogamous; these are choices about relationship form, not statements about who one is attracted to. Consensual (or ethical) non-monogamy - the umbrella for any arrangement where all partners knowingly agree to multiple romantic or sexual relationships - is the key dividing line from cheating, which is non-consensual.
These structures overlap with LGBTQ+ communities for historical and cultural reasons (queer communities have long had to build relationship models outside the heterosexual-monogamous default), but non-monogamy is practiced by people of every orientation, and many LGBTQ+ people are monogamous. The terms below describe forms, not identities, though some people do experience non-monogamy or relationship anarchy as core to who they are. (See the Polyamorous profile in Part 2 for the identity dimension.)
| Structure | Description |
|---|---|
| Hierarchical polyamory | Designated "primary" and "secondary" partners, explicitly ranked |
| Non-hierarchical polyamory | All relationships treated with equal weight; no formal ranking |
| Kitchen table polyamory | All partners know each other and socialize together |
| Parallel polyamory | Partners are aware of each other but live relatively separate lives with minimal interaction |
| Solo polyamory | Prioritizes personal independence; does not seek cohabitation, legal marriage, or merged finances with any partner |
| Relationship Anarchy (RA) | Rejects all predefined relationship categories and hierarchies; all relationships fully self-defined |
| Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) / Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM) | Umbrella terms for any relationship structure in which all parties consent to multiple romantic/sexual relationships |
| Open relationship | A committed partnership in which partners agree to allow sexual and sometimes romantic relationships with others |
| Swinging | Recreational sexual activity with people outside a committed partnership, typically as a couple; focuses on sex rather than emotional relationships |
| Queer Platonic Relationship (QPR) | A deeply committed relationship that is emotionally close but not romantic in the traditional sense; common in aromantic and asexual communities |
A note on QPRs and the amatonormativity critique: Queer platonic relationships challenge amatonormativity - the cultural assumption that a central, exclusive romantic-sexual partnership is the goal and pinnacle of everyone's life. For many aromantic and asexual people, a QPR is a primary life relationship that simply isn't romantic in the conventional sense. This reframes the idea that friendship is automatically "lesser" than romance. (See the Aromantic Spectrum and Asexual Spectrum profiles, and the Attraction Spectrum.)
Legal note: Most jurisdictions recognize only two-person monogamous marriage. Polyamorous and other multi-partner families generally lack legal recognition, which creates practical vulnerabilities around parentage, inheritance, hospital visitation, and immigration. A small number of US municipalities (e.g. Somerville, MA, 2020) have begun recognizing domestic partnerships of more than two people.