Achillean / MLM (Men Loving Men)

An umbrella term for men (and masculine-aligned people) attracted to other men, regardless of whether they also experience attraction to other genders.

Definition

An umbrella term for men (and masculine-aligned people) attracted to other men, regardless of whether they also experience attraction to other genders. Encompasses gay, bisexual, pansexual, and queer men, and masculine-aligned non-binary people. MLM (Men Loving Men) is used similarly in online spaces.

Flag

Achillean / MLM (Men Loving Men) flag · Designer: pridenpositivity (Tumblr), redrawn by Pride-Flags (DeviantArt) · 2016

Three horizontal stripes, light blue above a pale almost-white centre and light blue again, with a single green carnation centred on the pale stripe. Blue stands for men and masculinity; the carnation is the flower Oscar Wilde and his circle wore, a Victorian signal of love between men. Built as the counterpart to the sapphic flag, which uses the same shape with pink stripes and a violet. Credited to the Tumblr blog pridenpositivity in 2016, with the version in general use redrawn by the Pride-Flags account on DeviantArt on 5 October 2016. Several references say only that it was made by a Tumblr user in 2016 or 2017 and name nobody, so the attribution is reasonably well supported but not certain. No official colour specification has ever been published. The values here are the widely circulated community set; they are community convention, not an authoritative standard. Reference sites differ by a digit or two on the blue and the cream, giving #9AC6E9 and #FAFDEA for the values shown here. This flag is not the gay men's flag. That is a separate 2019 design in greens and indigos, and it has its own entry.

Colour codes: Achillean / MLM (Men Loving Men) flag
Stripe	HEX	RGB	CMYK	Pantone	Meaning
Top stripe	`#99C6EA`	153,198,234	C:35 M:15 Y:0 K:8	n/a	Light blue, for men and masculinity
Middle stripe	`#F9FDEA`	249,253,234	C:2 M:0 Y:8 K:1	n/a	The pale, almost white ground the carnation is set against
Bottom stripe	`#99C6EA`	153,198,234	C:35 M:15 Y:0 K:8	n/a	Light blue, for men and masculinity
Carnation petals	`#ACDD4D`	172,221,77	C:22 M:0 Y:65 K:13	n/a	The green carnation: a Victorian signal of love between men, popularised by Oscar Wilde
Carnation shading	`#659533`	101,149,51	C:32 M:0 Y:66 K:42	n/a	The deeper green in the flower

Full flag history →

Etymology

From the Greek hero Achilles, whose bond with Patroclus has been interpreted by many scholars as romantic and/or sexual - mirroring how "sapphic" references the poet Sappho. Adopted from academic queer studies into community use through Tumblr in the 2010s.

History

Academic use of "achillean" to reference male same-sex love predates community adoption. Tumblr users in the 2010s began using it alongside "sapphic" as a community identity label - useful for bisexual and pansexual men and for masculine-aligned non-binary people who felt excluded by "gay" as a label.

The achillean flag and the gay men's flag are not the same flag

The words achillean, vincian and MLM overlap almost completely. The flags do not, and it is easy to trip over. The achillean flag is the one shown here: light blue stripes with a pale centre and a green carnation, made in 2016 as the counterpart to the sapphic flag. The gay men's flag is a separate 2019 design by Triton in greens, white and indigos, and it appears on the Gay entry.

In practice people use either for achillean, and both are correct. If you want the one that reads as achillean specifically rather than as gay, it is the carnation flag.

Common myths

"Achillean is just a synonym for gay." Achillean is a broader umbrella - it encompasses gay men, but also bisexual men, pansexual men, and masculine-aligned non-binary people who are attracted to men or masculinity and feel excluded by "gay" as a label.
"The Achilles/Patroclus relationship was just a close friendship." The scholarly consensus increasingly interprets their bond as romantic and/or erotic. Plato's Symposium describes it in overtly romantic terms. The "just friends" reading reflects later revisionist traditions.