| Term | Definition |
|---|---|
| A-Spec | Umbrella for anyone on the asexual or aromantic spectrums |
| Ace | Shorthand for asexual |
| Acephobia / arophobia (aphobia) | Negative attitudes, prejudice or discrimination aimed at asexual and aromantic people, from bullying to erasure. Aphobia is the umbrella word for both, and some aro people prefer the word aromisia. |
| Aesthetic attraction | Appreciating appearance without desire for sexual/romantic contact |
| Affectional orientation | Attraction based on emotional bonds |
| Allonormative | Assumption that everyone experiences sexual and romantic attraction |
| Alloromantic | Experiences romantic attraction in typical ways (non-aromantic) |
| Allosexism | The social assumption that everyone does and should experience sexual attraction, and the exclusion of asexual people that follows from it. |
| Allosexual | Experiences sexual attraction in typical ways (non-asexual) |
| Allyship | The ongoing practice of supporting and advocating for a group you do not belong to, through action rather than label alone. |
| AMAB / AFAB / AISAB | Assigned Male / Female / Intersex At Birth |
| Amatonormativity | The assumption that a central, exclusive romantic relationship is a normal goal for everyone and is more valuable than other kinds of relationship. Coined by philosopher Elizabeth Brake in Minimizing Marriage (Oxford University Press, 2012). |
| Anti-gender movement | A transnational coalition of mainly conservative and religious groups that campaigns against LGBTQIA+ rights, sexual and reproductive rights, sex education and gender studies, often under the slogan of fighting "gender ideology". |
| Aro | Shorthand for aromantic |
| Ballroom culture | A cultural tradition, primarily among Black and Latino LGBTQIA+ people, organized around houses, balls, and voguing; originating in NYC in the 1970s |
| Bi erasure | The tendency to overlook, deny or question the existence of bisexuality, for instance by assuming a bi person is "really" gay or straight depending on their current partner. Also called bi invisibility. |
| Binding | Flattening chest tissue using a binder garment; practiced by many transmasculine and GNC people Browse our binders |
| Biphobia | Prejudice, negative attitudes or discrimination directed at bisexual and other multisexual people, which can come from both straight and queer communities. |
| Bodily autonomy | The right to make your own decisions about your body, health and future without violence or coercion. It underpins informed consent in gender-affirming and intersex care. |
| Bottom surgery | Informal name for genital gender-affirming surgeries such as vaginoplasty, phalloplasty or metoidioplasty. |
| Breast forms | Silicone forms worn in a bra, or attached to the skin with adhesive, to give the shape of breasts; used by many trans women and transfeminine people. Also called breast prostheses Browse our breast forms and shapewear |
| Bury your gays | A long-running media trope in which queer characters are killed off or given tragic endings, often only to move a straight character's story forward. Queer women characters have been hit especially hard. |
| Celibacy | Behavioral choice to abstain from sexual activity - not an orientation |
| Chosen family | A network of close relationships, usually including non-biological people, that functions as family; particularly important in LGBTQIA+ communities where biological family may have rejected someone |
| Chosen name | The name a person uses to reflect who they are, which may differ from their legal name. For trans people it is simply their real name, whether or not it has been changed legally. Also called lived name. |
| Cisgender | Gender identity matches sex assigned at birth |
| Cishet | Short for cisgender and heterosexual, used for people who are both. |
| Cisnormativity | The assumption, by individuals and institutions, that everyone is cisgender, so that forms, spaces and services are built only for cis people. |
| Cissexism | Systemic bias that favours cisgender people and treats cis identities and bodies as more natural or legitimate than trans ones. |
| Clocking | Recognising or reading someone as trans, usually when they did not want to be seen that way. Being "clocked" is the opposite of passing. |
| Closeted | Not open about one's sexual orientation or gender identity, to others or sometimes to oneself. Often phrased as being "in the closet". |
| Coming in | A person's first steps into LGBTQIA+ community life, such as finding groups, bars, online spaces or books where they recognise themselves. A term used notably in Flemish community work alongside coming out. |
| Coming out | Voluntarily sharing one's sexual orientation or gender identity with others. It is usually an ongoing process rather than a single moment, and there is no one right way to do it. |
| Compersion | A feeling of joy when a partner enjoys another romantic or sexual relationship. Often described as the opposite of jealousy in polyamorous communities. |
| Comphet | Compulsory heterosexuality - social pressure to be heterosexual |
| Conversion therapy | Any attempt to change a person's sexual orientation or gender identity; widely condemned and banned in many jurisdictions |
| Deadname, deadnaming | A deadname is the birth name a trans person no longer uses. Deadnaming is calling someone by it after they have changed it. It is hurtful, and in some situations it also outs the person. |
| Detransition | Stopping or reversing a gender transition. Reasons vary. In the largest US sample, 82.5% of people who had detransitioned reported at least one external driver such as family pressure, harassment or job loss, and 15.9% reported at least one internal driver such as a change in how they understood their gender (Turban et al., 2021, analysing the 2015 US Transgender Survey). Other studies of smaller, self-selected groups report higher rates of identity change, so treat any single figure with care. |
| DSD (differences of sex development) | A medical umbrella term for innate variations in sex characteristics. Many intersex people find it stigmatising, especially in its older form "disorders of sex development", and prefer "intersex" or "intersex variations". |
| Dyadic | Having sex characteristics that fit clearly within the male or female binary (non-intersex) |
| Egg | Community slang for a trans person who has not yet realised they are trans. When they do, the egg is said to "crack". |
| Enby | Informal pronunciation of "NB" (non-binary); used as a noun |
| Ethical non-monogamy (ENM) | An umbrella term for relationship styles in which people have more than one romantic or sexual partner with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Also called consensual non-monogamy. |
| Facial feminisation surgery (FFS) | A group of plastic surgery procedures that reshape facial features, such as the brow, jaw or nose, to give a more typically feminine appearance. |
| Gatekeeping | When health professionals or institutions put unnecessary hurdles in front of gender-affirming care, requiring trans people to prove who they are or that they really need treatment. |
| Gender binary | The social system that recognises only two genders, male and female, and treats them as opposites. Also written binary gender. |
| Gender dysphoria | Distress from mismatch between gender identity and assigned sex |
| Gender euphoria | Positive feelings from alignment of identity and expression |
| Gender expansive | Umbrella for anyone whose gender goes beyond typical expectations |
| Gender expression | How a person outwardly shows gender, through clothing, hair, voice, name, behaviour and more. It does not necessarily say anything about gender identity. |
| Gender identity | A person's internal, deeply held sense of their own gender, whether woman, man, non-binary or something else. It is not visible to others. |
| Gender incongruence | The diagnostic term in the WHO's ICD-11 for a marked and persistent mismatch between a person's experienced gender and the sex assigned at birth. Unlike its predecessors it sits outside the chapter on mental disorders. |
| Gender marker | The sex or gender recorded on official documents such as a birth certificate, identity card or passport, usually M, F or in some countries X. |
| Gender nonconforming (GNC) | Gender expression that doesn't conform to norms for assigned sex |
| Gender outlaw | Person who refuses to be defined by society's gender categories |
| Gender-affirming care | Medical and/or social interventions that support a person's gender identity, including HRT, surgery, and pronoun/name changes |
| Gender-affirming surgery (GAS) | Surgical procedures that align a person's body with their gender identity; also called gender confirmation surgery |
| Gray-asexual (graysexual) | Rarely or only weakly experiences sexual attraction. Sits between asexual and allosexual on the ace spectrum. Also spelled grey-asexual and greysexual. |
| Hair removal (electrolysis and laser) | Methods used by many trans people, especially trans women, for long-term reduction of facial or body hair. Laser targets dark hair over larger areas, while electrolysis destroys individual follicles and works on all hair colours. |
| Heteronormativity | Assumption that heterosexuality is the default |
| Heterosexism | Attitudes and systems that assume everyone is heterosexual and treat heterosexuality as better or more normal, excluding LGBTQIA+ experiences. |
| Homophobia | Prejudice, hostility or discrimination against lesbian, gay, bi and queer people, expressed in attitudes, speech, actions or policies. |
| HRT | Hormone replacement therapy - the use of hormones (estrogen, testosterone, or hormone blockers) to feminize or masculinize the body as part of gender transition |
| Informed consent | Healthcare model providing gender-affirming care (especially HRT) to adults without requiring psychiatric evaluation or gatekeeping |
| Internalized homophobia / transphobia | Absorbing and directing negative societal messages about one's own identity against oneself |
| Intersectionality | Framework for understanding how overlapping identities create distinct experiences |
| Kitchen table polyamory | A polyamory style in which everyone in a network is on friendly, family-like terms, even people who are not dating each other. |
| Legal gender recognition (LGR) | The process of changing the name and gender marker on official documents to match a person's identity. In Belgium, since 2018 this no longer requires medical conditions and is done by declaration at the municipality. |
| Lesbophobia | Prejudice, negative attitudes or discrimination directed specifically at lesbians, often combining homophobia and sexism. |
| M-Spec / Plurisexual | Attracted to more than one gender; umbrella for bi, pan, omni, poly, etc. |
| Metamour | Your partner's partner, with whom you do not have a romantic or sexual relationship yourself. |
| Microaggression | A brief, often subtle comment or action, intended or not, that communicates a negative or dismissive message about a marginalised identity. Repeated microaggressions contribute to minority stress. |
| Microlabel | A highly specific identity term, often coined in online communities, describing a nuanced variation of orientation or gender |
| Minority stress | Chronic, excess stress arising from a stigmatized social status |
| Misgender | Using incorrect gendered terms or pronouns for someone |
| Mononormativity | The assumption that monogamy is the natural or healthiest form of relationship, and the social pressure that enforces it. |
| Monosexism | The belief that being attracted to only one gender is superior or more real, and the resulting exclusion of bi, pan and other multisexual people. |
| Monosexual | Attracted to only one gender |
| Mx. | A gender-neutral title used in place of Mr, Ms or Mrs, usually pronounced "mix". |
| NBLW | Short for non-binary people loving women, a label non-binary people use to describe attraction to women. It sits under the sapphic umbrella alongside WLW. |
| Neopronouns | Gender-neutral pronouns beyond they/them (ze/zir, xe/xem, fae/faer, etc.) |
| New relationship energy (NRE) | The strong, giddy excitement and infatuation typical at the start of a new romantic relationship. Polyamorous people often name it so it can be managed alongside existing relationships. |
| Outing | Disclosing another person's LGBTQIA+ identity without consent |
| Packing | Wearing a packer (a soft prosthetic or padding) in the underwear to create a bulge; commonly done by transmasculine people to ease dysphoria Browse our packers and STPs |
| Parallel polyamory | A polyamory style in which a person's relationships run largely independently, with little or no contact between their different partners. |
| Passing | Being read by others as a particular gender, usually the one a person identifies as. The word is also used for being read as straight or as cisgender. Many people find it a loaded term, because it frames other people as the judges. |
| Polycule | A connected network of people who are romantically, sexually or emotionally involved with at least one other person in the network. |
| Preferred pronouns | An older phrase for the pronouns someone uses. Most trans organisations now advise simply saying "pronouns", because "preferred" suggests they are optional. |
| Privilege | Unearned advantages that people receive because they belong to a particular social group, such as being cisgender or straight, often without noticing them. |
| Pronoun round | A practice in which everyone in a group is invited to share their name and pronouns at the start of a meeting or event. Good practice keeps sharing optional so no one is pushed to disclose. |
| Puberty blockers | Medicines (GnRH analogues) that temporarily pause the physical changes of puberty. Their use for trans adolescents is the subject of ongoing clinical and political debate in several European countries. |
| Queerbaiting | Hinting that a character or public figure may be queer to attract LGBTQIA+ audiences, without ever committing to real representation. |
| Queerplatonic relationship (QPR) | A deeply committed relationship that is not romantic, with a closeness that ordinary friendship language does not capture. Usually shortened to QPR. |
| Rainbow washing / pinkwashing | Adopting LGBTQIA+ symbols without meaningful action or structural support. Pinkwashing is the related term for a state or company that promotes an LGBTQIA+-friendly image to distract from human rights violations or other harm. It is used most often in criticism of Israel's promotion of its LGBTQIA+ rights record alongside its treatment of Palestinians. |
| Rapid onset gender dysphoria (ROGD) | A term coined in 2018 for a hypothesised sudden onset of trans identity in adolescents through social influence. It is not a recognised diagnosis, and several professional bodies have called for it not to be used because the evidence behind it is weak. |
| Relationship anarchy (RA) | An approach to relationships that rejects fixed hierarchies and rules, letting people shape each connection freely rather than ranking romantic partners above friends. |
| Retransition | Resuming a gender transition after a period of detransition |
| Romantic orientation | Describes whom a person is romantically attracted to, if anyone. It can differ from sexual orientation, as the split attraction model describes. |
| SAAB | Sex Assigned At Birth |
| Safe space | A place or group meant to be free of bias, hostility and threatening behaviour, where marginalised people can speak freely. The idea took hold in LGBTQIA+ and women's movements, where gay bars and consciousness-raising groups served as early safe spaces. |
| SAM | Split Attraction Model - framework separating sexual from romantic orientation |
| Sensual attraction | A wish for non-sexual physical contact with someone, such as cuddling, hugging or holding hands. Often distinguished from sexual attraction in ace communities. |
| Sex-repulsed / sex-favourable | Terms describing a person's attitude towards sex itself, separate from attraction. A sex-repulsed person finds sex unappealing or repellent, while others may be sex-indifferent or sex-favourable. Used mainly on the asexual spectrum. |
| Sexual orientation | Describes a person's enduring pattern of physical, romantic or emotional attraction, or lack of it, to others. It is separate from gender identity. |
| Singular they | Use of "they/them" pronouns for a single person; grammatically standard in English for centuries; designated Word of the Year by American Dialect Society in 2015 |
| SOGIESC | Short for sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression and sex characteristics. It is used in European and international law and policy as a neutral umbrella for the grounds LGBTQIA+ rights cover. |
| Solo polyamory | A polyamory approach centred on personal autonomy, in which a person does not seek a nesting or couple-centred primary relationship. |
| Stand-to-pee (STP) | Using a funnel-shaped device to urinate while standing; some packers have one built in. Used by many transmasculine people Browse our packers and STPs |
| Stealth | A trans person who does not disclose their trans identity in daily life |
| TERF / gender-critical | TERF stands for trans-exclusionary radical feminist. It and "gender-critical" describe people who hold that sex is binary and immutable and who oppose recognising trans women as women. The people it describes usually reject the label TERF and call themselves gender-critical. |
| Top surgery | Informal name for gender-affirming chest surgery, such as mastectomy with chest reconstruction or breast augmentation. |
| Trans broken arm syndrome | When healthcare workers wrongly attribute a trans person's unrelated health problem to their gender identity or hormone treatment, delaying proper care. It also covers invasive, unnecessary questions about a person's gender or transition during care for something else. |
| Transition | The steps a person takes to live as their gender. It can be social (name, pronouns, presentation), medical (hormones, surgery) or legal (documents), and each person chooses which apply to them. |
| Transmedicalism | The view that experiencing gender dysphoria, and usually wanting medical transition, is required to be trans. It is widely criticised in trans communities for excluding many trans and non-binary people. |
| Transmisogyny | The combined prejudice of transphobia and misogyny, which falls especially on trans women and transfeminine people. |
| Transphobia | Prejudice, fear, hostility or discrimination against trans people, expressed personally or through policies and institutions. |
| Triad | A polyamorous relationship between three people, who may or may not all be involved with each other. Also called a throuple. |
| Tucking | Concealing male-assigned genitalia using underwear or tape; practiced by some trans women and femme-presenting AMAB people Browse our tucking underwear |
| Two-Spirit | An English-language umbrella term, created by Indigenous people in 1990, for Indigenous North Americans whose gender or sexuality sits outside colonial categories, often in connection with a traditional ceremonial or social role. It does not replace nation-specific terms and is not for non-Indigenous people. |
| Unicorn | In polyamory, a (usually bisexual) woman sought by a couple to join them as a shared third partner. "Unicorn hunting" is widely criticised in poly communities because the couple's rules often leave the third partner with little say. |
| Voice training | Practice, alone or with a speech therapist, to change pitch, resonance, intonation and other aspects of speech so a voice fits a person's gender. |
| WLW | Short for women who love women, covering lesbians, bi and pan women and others. Some prefer the wider word sapphic. |
| X marker | A non-binary gender marker, shown as X on documents in some countries. In 2019 Belgium's Constitutional Court ruled that binary-only registration discriminates against non-binary people and asked parliament to act. Belgium has no X marker. In 2025 the federal government said it would instead allow identity cards without a sex marker on request. |
